Open Letter to Facebook

Dear Facebook,

I have been a member of your community for over a decade. 
During this time, I kept in touch with old friends, made new ones and discovered some extraordinary people. 
Many stories and pictures moved me to tears or made me sob for hours on end, some others made me burst into laughter. 
You helped me grow my readers’ circle, you facilitated my spiritual development and allowed me to see my family through your messenger video calls.

I am ever so grateful for all this.

You, as a social platform, are a great tool for introverted people.
My world was so, so terribly small and you unfolded the entire universe in front of me.
I learned a lot and I cannot thank you enough for opening my eyes. 
I can’t even remember what I was before you. 

You, dear Facebook, are the social platform that I’ve felt attracted to from the start. I found you easy to use.
As a writer in search of a readership, you are the one that I’ve used with predilection to share my blogs and thoughts.
You meant a lot, a real lot, to me and for many years I held you in high esteem.

That until, all of a sudden, you’ve started to block my pages, hide my comments, deny my adverts, prevent me from sharing links from my blogs… Over, and over and over again. 

I was so, so very confused as to why you would do such things to me. 
You've never explained. Not once made it clear.  

'Why me?!?!’
Asks everyone, right?
Except for I am not everyone.

You see, dear Facebook, I am a fervid advocate for kindness.
  • I stand against every sort of discrimination, but I am not a catalyst for war against the bigots. I don’t instigate people to violence and savage behaviour. 
  • I don’t like arguments, so I don’t lead any. I am not a polemical person.
  • I don’t offend those who offend me. I don’t pay in the same coin.
  • I refrain myself from becoming like them: irrational, mean, malicious… plain evil. Shallow and despicable.
  • I encourage tolerance and understanding. 
I say that ‘I am a good person' because I truly am a good person to the core. 

That, of course, if you don't go chasing people who despise me. 
There are always two sides to the same story, right? 
Rest assured that those who hate me most, those who laugh harder when I am hurt, are people I helped. 

Dear Facebook, in 11 years of being part of your community you allowed quite a few monsters of evil to harass, bully and defame me (and so many, too many others), ruin my reputation, destroy years of hard work with a click of a button with no repercussions for them. 
You didn't delete spam comments from my posts (as requested), you failed to protect my account etc. and I still stood by you. 
I always spoke highly of you. 

So, imagine my surprise, when on the 25th of July 2021,  you gave me a warning. 


And yes, I want the entire world to know it, not only me.  

And that happened following this comment, which you hid from my personal account as soon as it was posted.  



Because it’s in Romanian (with a few grammar mistakes), I am going to translate it for those who don't read gibberish (grammar errors left out - they don't impact the readiness of the message):

***
'You don't have to, ma'am. But I don't think such a comment is fair, considering that I have shown with facts that I care about you. I'm at work 24 hours a day, esteemed madam (dear lady?). 
I have about 100 projects that I work on in my break. I don't even have time to log on to Facebook. 
And I shouldn't have to explain myself to anyone. 
Even though I understand your frustration perfectly, I do not appreciate gratuitous malice. 
If you don't care, don't comment.' 
***

My words were a diplomatic reply to an unnecessarily callous comment left by a wicked being. 
Sorry, I didn't have the chance to take a print screen of it when it was posted. 
I remember it well, firstly because it (was short) lacked punctuation, capitals etc. and secondly because it wittingly lacked tact. 

It was deliberately disrespectful and mean.  See below why I am so sure of that. 

***
Romanian or gibberish: 'nu imi pasa ca nici altora nu le pasa punct' 

English: 'i don't care because others don't care either period' 
*** 

It’s important to know that the individual behind this controversial demonstration of unkindness is an educated one. Moreover, it’s someone I helped. 

I spoke my mind as a victim of abuse. I defended my harmless post and its meaning (which, by the way, was irony).  


My reply wasn’t mean, it wasn’t bullying, it was just and perfectly appropriate. 
If something, it was too kind. 
I don't enjoy being slapped in the face by those I help. 


To add salt to injury, you’ve given me a warning (see print shot).
That was what outraged me.  



To be clear, the comment wasn’t removed by you, but by me (sort of). 
When you block someone, their activities (and your contribution to them) disappear from your pages. 
In this case, you hid it, I blocked the frustrated being. 
Comments gone. Both. 
I refuse to keep 'friends' like that. 

And again, this hasn’t happened last year or 90 days ago (as the print screen states), but on the 25th of July 2021. 
What post from last year? 
Why these incongruences? 
Is there a real person behind this babel? 

Then, on the 29th of July, you’ve prevented me from sharing this blog post on my brother’s page.  



It’s a Happy Birthday post (click to read it) in which I express my love and gratitude towards my little brother.
A couple of minutes later – I don’t know how and why – you permitted me to post it in the comments. 

Why would you block a post like that (instantly I mean)? 
Is my account on your Black List? 
Based on what? 
According to whom? 
Whose reporting? 
What have I really did wrong? 
What is it?! 

Is it my name that doesn't sound well? 
My nationality? 
Are my pictures too pudic? 
Am I too catholic for you? 
What is it with me that annoys you? 
Am I intentionally targeted by someone (in your staff) that can't stand my presence in this virtual world? 
It isn't my content. I can't be! My content is harmless.  
It looks and feels personal. 

You know, I wouldn't be surprised if someone who hates me, works for you and does this deliberately with the only intent to harm me. 
Must be someone I didn't reply to. Maybe declined their 'attention'. 

Dear Facebook, I am a writer and a blogger who raises awareness of racism without racists, of heinous actions veiled in all sorts of aberrant beliefs, of conceit disguised in constructive criticism.
I am ashamed of being a human in this world lately.


Therefore, dear Facebook, after days of careful consideration, I denounce your warning and actions towards my activities (posts, comments, ads etc.) as misfeasance. 
They are unjust and discriminatory. 
I would be entitled to plead ‘not guilty’ to whatever you're accusing me of in a court of law. 


I officially invite you to thoroughly check all my activities on your platform (posts, messages, everything) and blogs, if you like. It will be time-consuming though, I write on 50. 

You could use a program to start with, but as soon as your algorithms start to show red flags, I expect you to put a person in charge of my ‘investigation’.
But, please, delegate a grown-up human being, not one of those adolescents for which common sense, respect, conscience, compassion, soul etc. are abstract notions. Myths. Legends. 

You don't lack staff, do you? 
Unless they are all busy restricting accounts that don't click on adverts or check out clickbait material. 

Mistakes can happen indeed, dear Facebook, and you excel at making them. 

My legitimate questions are: 
  • Do you do it knowingly?
  • Have you planned on getting rid of good people from your platform?
  • If that so – as your actions towards me (and God knows how many others) prove it – to what end? 
Take the warning away, dear Facebook. Scrap my account from your Black list and put it on the Green one instead. 

Your algorithm doesn’t differentiate a sincere and nice person from millions that say they’re good people. 
No algorithm would ever be able to do that. 
There are too many variables. 

As a reasonable and objective human, I am perfectly aware that my feelings for you have never been reciprocated. 
My presence on your platform wasn't allowed out of sympathy, but as a means to an end. 
I appreciate why I am just a number to you (and most companies), nothing to be offended for. 
The society we live in dictates it (sort of) – but I am much more than a number and my online blogs and activities on your platform support that, without a shadow of a doubt. 

Is that the reason you are mean to me?! 

Please, ceasefire, end the war on kindness and meaningfulness. 

Stop hindering people like me from spreading love and doing whatever is within their power to make this world a better place.
Confirm that you don’t discriminate against humans of substance. 
Those humans' whose actions don't grow your bank accounts and don't add value to your investment. 
Useless to you. 

Ban those who deserve it. Really. 
Sanction those who reported me. 
They didn't report my content, they reported me. 
They were upset with me. 
It's personal. 

You want to make an example of someone? 
Look at your staff. 
The warning, the removal of all my content (in the past), the blockages of my pages and links, every (negative) action that was ever taken on my account was pure abuse of power. 

And don't do it as easily and automatically as you've done it with me (and way too many other innocent members). 
Take them to trial before condemning them in absence, based on testimonies of vindictive people (that have nothing better to do with their time and energy) or algorithms that misbehave.   

If instead, you choose to delete my profile, the 15 pages and the 4 groups I founded and manage (alone), well, then there isn’t much else to say.
Is there? 

Would you really do me a disservice if you kicked me out? 
To what extent? 

I take full responsibility for my actions and I'll use another platform or application to video call my 86-year-old mother next Tuesday. 
It's a shame, it took her a week to learn to switch the laptop on and go on Facebook, to wait for either of her 9 children to call. 
She was 78 and had never seen a computer before, never heard of Facebook and video calls. 

PS
Two other posts were published on this blog denouncing similar experiences. 
I've completely forgotten. 



















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