Pain - Painkillers or Mind Power Techniques? - childless

Maybe I shouldn't publish this post, as it's an extremely private matter, but I am doing it for study purposes.

Nota Bene

This was a study made in 2016, way before I wrote the book childless - How to Cope with Endometriosis & Vulvodynia - Holistic Approach. 

I found this document in one of my old folders and decided to publish it in case someone is interested. 

How many women suffer from period and chronic pain?
I am guessing, loads.
I am one of them.
My pain history goes back in time, and it's started with my very first “period” time.

I am against medicines, and I try any other remedy before giving up and taking classic painkillers.
Sometimes the pain is bearable, but most of the time it is not.
There are days in which I cannot get out of bed, I cannot sleep, nor think or work. But I have to so I am forced to take painkillers.
I have tried various in my life. Some work better than others.

But what to do when you are allergic to most of them?

It is not my case, but I know a person very closed to me, who recently had a serious health issue and went through two distinct surgery and several other treatments.
Most of the time she couldn't take any classical pill to make the pain acceptable. The pain she's been through cannot be expressed in words. My heart broke for her as I cannot work when I am in pain. I bet neither can you.
However, I cannot, but I do work. I can't miss work every time I am in pain.

This person in terrible pain drank various herbal teas and tried many homoeopathic remedies. No matter how many sustain, these don't take away the pain completely. It is up to your mind to make the body believe the pain is gone or has lowered.
This might sound science fiction for you, but it is effective, provided you work with your mind.

My pain tolerance is extremely high, but when I woke up in the middle of the night with a pain that stops me from breathing, I open a box of pills and take two after I eat an apple - never take a pill on an empty stomach. I try not to exceed, and I only use them in very extreme cases.

Yesterday, I have decided I will not take any classic remedy against pain this period time.
I have read about people curing themselves with the power of their minds. It sounds insane, but I believe it.
I am a such a pain now, that I cannot think clearly. I cannot breathe properly, I cannot sleep or do any activity. I have back pain, lower abdomen pain, headache and nausea. I have the sensation that someone has taken my kidneys into their hands and squeeze them hard or crush them with a stone over and over and over again.

I woke up at 1Am and I cringed from pain for hours, but I didn't take a pill.
I drank chamomile, sage and rosemary tea and I prayed it will go away. I couldn't fall asleep until 4Am. Lucky that I had some sleep really.
Then I woke up at 7, in such a pain that my skin had red spots all over my body, especially on the face and upper body.
I thought I will write today, but I cannot focus. Every 5 minutes I am tempted to give up and take a bloody pill, but I cannot ruin my study.
I read that you need to take the thought from pain and focus it on something you like. A memory maybe, watching a comedy, having a walk.
But I don't want to have a walk as I look kinda scary.
I can't watch movies because I have to write. I feel like looking for excuses to not write. So I am doing my best to go through these days without painkillers.
Earlier on I have thrown up and I really cannot stand that. I cannot eat anything, and I cannot cry.
How can people live like that? 
But I know that many people live with chronical pain. Nobody should feel such a thing. I feel miserable inside and outside.

Would I be able to go to work in these conditions? 
Absolutely not. But I work part-time now and I am home these days. I have two hot water bags on my abdomen. I feel hot and I will soon throw up again, but I don't want to give up.

I am trying to think of something nice. I am looking for a memory that will make me forget the pain. And I came up with Drake. The man I love. The name is fake, but the man is real. I wrote a romance novel about him and me: Half my Age Plus Seven - A Sinful Confession.
I am focusing on him with intensity and I swear to God, the pain is gone.
I am living a memory in time spent with him. He keeps me hold tight to him. I am so happy and want to stay there forever.

So, yes, it is possible to overcome pain with the power of our minds.
Love is the best remedy I came up with today.
Drake is not with me and he won't hold me in his arms ever again, but I can keep his memory alive.

I used to be part of a group of women with same pain issues. There are many forums online.
One day, a woman wrote that she's found relief from pain using a hot water bag.
The reaction of others has been an earthquake of magnitude 8 on the Richter scale.
She was insulted, offended, called with the most terrible appellative I ever heard. I tried to defend her, but nobody wanted to listen.
“You don't know what real pain is, otherwise you wouldn't come with such an abominable idea,” they said.
Pain transforms people into monsters of cruelty. Terrorists of humanity. I witness that every day of my life.

“You take your pills ladies, keep complaining and becoming inhuman,” I thought when I deleted my account.

Pain is not agonizing only for you, but for those around you too.

Use a bottle of water and look for a loving memory. Hold tight to it and I promise, you'll find relief, no matter how unbearable your pain is. If you don't have any, create one. Imagination is a powerful tool and is free to use.

I know that if I had a family, or had to go to school or work, I would have taken the pills without hesitation. I am not that absurd, but it can be done with the power of the mind. But it needs time and 100% dedication. Incredibly willpower that most don't have. We are all worn out because of the other issues that we need to afront every day of our lives.

What I am trying to say is that the more you think it hurts, it hurts even more. Guide your imagination into a state of happiness and see what happens.

I am going to throw up again, the pain is less intense, but nausea loves me too much.
I am not doing this experiment just for a study purpose, but because last time I took a painkiller, my stomach ached for three weeks. That pain was even more obstructive that the period pain.
However, the worse pain I have ever lived with was a teeth pain. I thought I will go insane. Never allow your teeth to go into an abscess.

I wish you a life free of pain. Good luck and be strong. You can do it!

Read childless - How to Cope with Endometriosis & Vulvodynia - Holistic Approach and you'll find out that my episodes of unbearable pain are almost all gone now. Read what I am doing every day to deal with the pain.

In this book, I also published recipes and various holistic approaches I discovered and applied to myself and other people I know.

If you suffer from endometriosis, chronic pain and infertility, this book is very useful.


  1. Very interesting theory. But it looks to me that it doesn't really work. Or if it does, you need to develop a superhuman force. I wish people didn't have to suffer like this. I am really sorry for you.

    1. You are right, Lina. It's extremely difficult and you need huge will power. When you are already exhausted, that's very difficult to apply. Thank you for your feedback. It's helpful.


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